Ryan Shattuck's Tumblr On the Internet

Me: I have a pimple near my nipple and I tried to pop it but it didn't pop all the way and now my nipple hurts.

Boyfriend: That rap was pretty good till the end!

Me: It wasn't a rap. It was a testimony.

Boyfriend: Then why did it have a phat beat?

Me: That's the Holy Ghost you're feeling.